So I've decided to stop posting anything here except personal stuff, jokes, or funny things that happen to be on my mind. I wasn't exactly expecting to spout out on so many non-personal and non-humorous issues when I started this thing.
So I present to you: Abstract of Reason
This will be the new home for any posts of mine that do not happen to fit within the personal nature of this blog. This includes all politics, society and anything else I deem worth of writing about that does not involve me personally. There might be a little overlap here and there, but I'm going to give this a shot and hopefully it will work out better than this blog alone has. At least I'll be able to stay on topic more often...
-Josh
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Friday, September 19, 2008
Pirate Jokes!
Shamelessly stolen Pirate Jokes in honor of International Talk Like a Pirate Day!
They say, "Once a pirate, always a pirate!" So why is it that these scurvy dogs never return to the straight and narrow?
Once you lose your first hand, yer HOOKED!
Why did the pirate wear a paper towel for a bandanna?
He heard that all good pirates have a bounty on their head!
Where would they send a Pirate Ship with a broken rib?
To the dock, in the sick bay.
Why couldn't the pirates play cards?
The captain was standing on the deck!
How do pirates know that they are pirates?
They know, because they ARRRR!!!!!
What does a bleached blonde and a pirate have in common?
A little black patch.
Did you hear about the pirate who took up boxing?
He had a killer left hook!
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck!
What's really a pirate's favorite letter?
P! Because it's an R, but it's missing a leg!
What's a horny pirate's worst nightmare?
A sunken chest with no booty!
What be a pirate's favorite vegetable?
ARRRRtichokes!
Have you heard about the new pirate movie?
It's rated AARRRRGGH! And you know why? Because of all the booty!
what do you call a pirate that skips class?
captain hooky!
What has 12 hands, 12 feet and 12 eyes?
A dozen Pirates!
What was Bluebeard's wife's name? Peg.
How does a pirate greet a prostitute? Yo Ho
What's a pirate's least favorite animal? Beaver.
Question: What did Captain Hook die from?
Answer: Jock Itch.
How did the pirate stop smoking?
He used the patch!
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Would it change your mind about McCain if you knew he called his wife a ...?
So one of the latest stories to hit the intertubes is a report that there is a company out there push-polling Jewish voters that are linking Obama with Palestinian Terrorist groups. If you aren't familiar with the idea of a push poll, it's the act of asking a question in such a way that implants ideas into the answerer's mind, even if they are not true. The questions in a push poll often start with "Would it change your mind about if" and then follows with a fabrication that is designed to leave a negative feeling. By the way, the headline for this post is no fabrication and based on a true story. Just google the last five words and leave McCains name out to find all the evidence you need.
However, this is the exact same kind of tactic that Karl Rove used against McCain in 2000 where the legitimacy of McCain's adopted black daughter was called into question. It was used at a point that could have had McCain prevailing over Bush in the South Carolina primary and possibly going on to take the Republican nomination that year. If McCain had won, the last 8 years would have been quite a bit different. Instead the tactic worked, he lost, and it changed him, but not for the better. Almost everything I've read about John McCain prior to the 2000 SC primary has made me admire him, but everything he's done since then has made me despise him. If it comes out that the Republican party is behind the push poll story I linked to above it will be a sad day indeed.
However, this is the exact same kind of tactic that Karl Rove used against McCain in 2000 where the legitimacy of McCain's adopted black daughter was called into question. It was used at a point that could have had McCain prevailing over Bush in the South Carolina primary and possibly going on to take the Republican nomination that year. If McCain had won, the last 8 years would have been quite a bit different. Instead the tactic worked, he lost, and it changed him, but not for the better. Almost everything I've read about John McCain prior to the 2000 SC primary has made me admire him, but everything he's done since then has made me despise him. If it comes out that the Republican party is behind the push poll story I linked to above it will be a sad day indeed.
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Labor Day Weekend
So this last weekend was a blast.
Technically my weekend began Thursday evening with the Gaelic Storm show at the Slowdown. This was the 2nd time they've been through this year and I must say the performance was phenomenal! I've got a good slew of my videos up on Youtube that shows just how close we were to the stage. Needless to say there was a fair amount of drinking involved (completely according to plan I might add!) so I took a day of vacation on Friday and got to sleep in.
Friday I went to the zoo with Angie for a few hours since she hasn't been there in quite a while and my zoo membership gets 2 in free. So I spent that afternoon taking pictures of the various animals and such. Sometimes I feel like I take our zoo for granted because I can just up and go whenever I want, it's hard to remember that it's actually a world class zoo with some of the largest exhibits in the world. Anyone who's watched a CWS game has most likely seen a shot of Rosenblatt stadium from atop the Desert Dome (Worlds Largest Indoor Desert). The walk-through aquarium is also must to experience, and these are only two of the big exhibits they have to offer
Saturday was the Husker game, which went quite a bit better than I had expected. Our running defense appeared to do very well while the passing d could still use a bit more work. Offense looked like it was on the right track as well, so I'm cautiously optimistic about the coming season...
Sunday was relatively quiet, didn't do much other than catch Tropic Thunder that evening, it was a lot funnier than I had expected it to be. I went in expecting "meh" and ended up laughing my ass off on more than one occasion.
After resting up and relaxing on Sunday we had a full day of... resting and relaxing at the lake! It was most likely going to be my last outing to the lake this year as the weather will unfortunately be taking a turn to the colder side soon (and that's already started today as it's 62F and rainy outside as I type). Luckily we had temps in the mid 90's, and just a little wind to contest with.
So all in all it was a good time, my sunburn is already more than tolerable (and here I was dreading it would be worse, hah! Take that sun!) Had a good time with the friends and now looking forward to more football, a few more concerts, and maybe some not so muggy weather, though I think the snow should definitely stay away for a good 3 months (or more!)
Technically my weekend began Thursday evening with the Gaelic Storm show at the Slowdown. This was the 2nd time they've been through this year and I must say the performance was phenomenal! I've got a good slew of my videos up on Youtube that shows just how close we were to the stage. Needless to say there was a fair amount of drinking involved (completely according to plan I might add!) so I took a day of vacation on Friday and got to sleep in.
Friday I went to the zoo with Angie for a few hours since she hasn't been there in quite a while and my zoo membership gets 2 in free. So I spent that afternoon taking pictures of the various animals and such. Sometimes I feel like I take our zoo for granted because I can just up and go whenever I want, it's hard to remember that it's actually a world class zoo with some of the largest exhibits in the world. Anyone who's watched a CWS game has most likely seen a shot of Rosenblatt stadium from atop the Desert Dome (Worlds Largest Indoor Desert). The walk-through aquarium is also must to experience, and these are only two of the big exhibits they have to offer
Saturday was the Husker game, which went quite a bit better than I had expected. Our running defense appeared to do very well while the passing d could still use a bit more work. Offense looked like it was on the right track as well, so I'm cautiously optimistic about the coming season...
Sunday was relatively quiet, didn't do much other than catch Tropic Thunder that evening, it was a lot funnier than I had expected it to be. I went in expecting "meh" and ended up laughing my ass off on more than one occasion.
After resting up and relaxing on Sunday we had a full day of... resting and relaxing at the lake! It was most likely going to be my last outing to the lake this year as the weather will unfortunately be taking a turn to the colder side soon (and that's already started today as it's 62F and rainy outside as I type). Luckily we had temps in the mid 90's, and just a little wind to contest with.
So all in all it was a good time, my sunburn is already more than tolerable (and here I was dreading it would be worse, hah! Take that sun!) Had a good time with the friends and now looking forward to more football, a few more concerts, and maybe some not so muggy weather, though I think the snow should definitely stay away for a good 3 months (or more!)
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